Overcoming Depression and Loss with Marvel

Each avenger has gone through molding and being shattered. That is their own origin story.

But for the first time they show different stages of grief of different people coping in different ways all in one movie.

Avenger’s Endgame is not a movie about getting wiped out. It is a movie about strength.

Spoilers Ahead!

Since everyone is blipped away after the snap. First grief, we get to see is of Barton’s.

Clint Barton’s entire family disappears in front of his own eyes. With him being absent from events of infinity war. It is understandable about his confusion, when he looks around to see everyone gone with a blink of an eye.

The last man standing in the field, he suffers not only the grief of losing his family but also becomes lost in his rage. He goes on a killing rampage running by the alias Rōnin as a way to deal with grief. He represents Anger. He is filled with pain and anger and he tries to push it towards eliminating the criminals in the most gruesome way.

When he loses Natasha, it is as if he cannot overcome his doings of past few years. While seeing Nat as his friend whom he cannot sacrifice or let sacrifice. She brings Clint hope when he is truly lost.

Tony Stark

We have seen Tony suffers from panic attacks, with his genius intellect he has the ability to see what can happen next and his ability to be prepared though in an unconventional way.

He loses Peter Parker and is stricken with grief. He has suffered from being kidnapped and getting panic attacks but this time being alone in space with an alien with no supplies and no hope left. He is dishearted. He is torn between anger, bargaining and depression. He still feels that he is responsible for this happening. Therefore getting more angry at steve for feeling betrayed by him.

His ego does help look forward to the future which he does. He somehow manages to move forward to having a life with Pepper and Morgan.

None the less he still misses Peter.

Natasha Romanoff

She feels pain and expresses. Like a normal person she tries hard to find solutions unable to accept that they have lost everyone.

Also she eats peanut butter and jelly to make herself feel better. Even when she has Steve trying to bring too much resilience she expresses sadness with no second thoughts.

Steve Rogers

The grandpa who ‘can do this all day’ it is seriously annoying how he can recover from anything. And thats what he is in, he helps out Sam’s group and others in group meetings. He also tries to do the same to Nat but she refuses. He brings nothing but positivity. I wont say he has reached acceptance but he is way past it.

He and Peggy have drank some sort of ‘quick recovery mode’ they always seem to overcome without even stopping.

Steve never shows an ounce of anger or any destructive emotion even though he has lost Peggy, Bucky and Sam and many more.

I seriously think no individual can be like that. Because it is too hard of thing to do.

Scott Lange

He shows denial and also believe in possibility. He loses everyone but Cassie. Even though he is just an engineer slash thief he believes in using Quantum Realm to change everything.

He is still upbeat and yet treated so badly by Rocket.

Everyone has lost someone. And their way to grief is channeling at work. The most weird character I find is Captain Marvel.

She literally has shown no emotions what so ever. Even in Captain Marvel, I somehow feel dettacted.

I wish they showed the impact of losing their king for Wakanda. Nebula loses her sister but she is a cyborg so its okay if she shows no emotion.

Hulk

Bruce Banner is like a split personality. He cannot silence his other personality but it keeps coming out every now and then. In endgame he seems to have reached Acceptance. Both for blip as well as for accepting himself.

He accepts Hulk as well as his true self as Bruce Banner. Making peace with himself and accepting his both sides making it one. Honestly Bruce becomes a big teddy bear I wish to hug. He even develops humour.

I also noticed Bruce keeps looking like himself over each movie.

My favourite thing about this changed Bruce is that he helps Thor out. He even lets him know that he is there for him as well as tell him that he is the one who made him change into this version of him. Can we take in consideration the tubby bear once was so much angry and unable to accept himself that he tried commiting suicide? I think it’s best that Hulk spit the bullet out.

Thor

Lastly this guy. The viking who is always proud and now becomes completely shattered. He completely gives into depression. I guess I love him because he makes us feel that even the strongest and mightiest people can fall. He loses bit by bit and this is like a combination of every greater event that makes him kneel down and fall.

The reason why Thor is massively depressed, he loses his parents, his adopted brother, his older sister, his best friend, his love interest. I think Thor is the only Avenger who loses literally everyone near him. Not just that his entire home planet gets destroyed. Even when he speaks of retrieving stones he keeps reminiscing on the past of what used to be. Unable to live and accept. Constantly living painfully in denial. His appearance says two things about him. He has completely stopped caring about himself. Indulging in drinking and food and video games. And sulking into pain and anger. He doesnt lose Loki once, he loses him 3 times. He finally gets to have Loki be a brother to him only to witness his death by Thanos. That’s completely brutal, he always counted on his brothers trickery to come back to life.

When he goes back in past. His depression kicks in and makes him feel utterly sad to watch his mother on the day she is going to die. He starts getting a panic attack and does the next best thing run away. Though they are cautioned not to give any crucial information to the past. His mother seems to know it before hand.

Frigga is quick to realise he is from the future. Thor is still a child, who loves his mother unable to lie to her. Embracing her and after the short lovely moments they have she makes him accept reality.

I think Frigga is most impactful mother. She makes Loki want to be a better person, also sees better in him, knowing his darkest deeds. She makes Thor believe in himself even in these few moments. Thor is raised by a lot of love and too much of his ego is fed by everyone. I guess I understand why he is so proud and full of himself.

You know the best part of it is that they dont show a montage of thor doing pull ups and getting healthy and extremely chiseled as he was before. They show him become ready to bring Thanos down. He even cheers Steve for yeilding the Mjolnir. Thor is like a soft baby underneath, he seems tough outside but he is really good. Imagine someone being able to have your position and you cheer them on. Most people egotistical diva’s wouldn’t.

I think this is why Thor is the most amazing character. He is real to himself and everyone else. He can be a jerk but he is strong not because he is worthy. He is strong to look forward to another day. After the time heist he knows no one is going to be back. He still does it standing by his co-workers slash groupies and giving his best and fights.

From all the other heroes, he is the one who expresses every bit of emotion and every bit of destruction of himself and comes back stronger.

That’s what matters rising above what has occured and moving past it. If today feels dreadful and painful. You feel all of it and someday you will realise all that pain has become a scurf. It does leave a mark, it builds our character.

Fiction aside our lives have terrible events which we neither can time heist nor can we snap out of them. Depression is very painful and many suffer. Many hide their depression while many fully embrace and acknowldege they have it and start working on it. Life is scary, we all have different personalities and different types of thinking and perspectives. We don’t react the same or reason the same way. For the worst time we live. I would like to give few notes on what one can do.

1. Without a doubt, never ever speak your inner darkest thoughts to others. Never! Its going to be same as drunken speech. You will regret it. So can you do? You feel the need to let it out? Write it down. Scribble it down. Put your voice in your voice recorder for all that you have to say. This angry rant which you are carrying let it out all at once. Once you are done you can delete it.

Start journaling, we all have a spiderman like narrative going in our heads when most people we talk to are not, peter friendly. Trust me being way too honest drives people away.

Each time you are filled with over thinking, one always knows they are overthinking. Our mind always, almost always goes to destructive habits. When you’re overthinking stop what you are doing. Just take a walk outside, outside in the sun or evening or at night (unless its not safe) just do something which makes you breathless.

I would feel like I am overthinking, spend days doing nothing… I decided to go to gym one day, and as I started to walk and pace on the treadmill my thinking stopped. Find a particular thing, maybe a hobby which can activate your brain to fully use it to concentrate on doing something. Perhaps its playing a bassoon or taking up a learning class.

You don’t need to be together in few mins or a month. Its stupid for people to say snap out of it. Get it together, only you know the grief you are in. Take your time and keep on moving.

For the time you are recovering say no to social media. Deactive. You will realise you have a lot of time on your hand. Make a time table. Get up at the same time everday in the morning. Give yourself a goal to reach for the day. Make your bed, take a shower, clean out your closet, rearrange them, clean your room. If it gets overwhelming its okay. You live your life for yourself. One day I assure you, you will wake up and remember the past and feel no overwhelming feeling. The day you start living in today. And every new day is today.

Have a wonderful day.

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